Anxiety

Simply Begin Again – Podcast 133 (5:50)

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Ever feel stuck or discouraged about moving forward? Here is a simple exercise that makes all the difference.

Transcript

Welcome to the Sabbath Cafe Podcast. This is Episode 133 – Simply begin again.
For transcripts and more episodes, please go to sabbathcafe.substack.com.

Hi everyone! Thanks for listening to the Sabbath Cafe Podcast. And welcome to our first episode of 2025. I hope you all had a good holiday season and had a good restful time.

Usually me and my family, we take a break in some downtime at the end of the year. And so by the time January rolls around, supposedly we’re all ready to go, right? I was very excited. I had a great break with a lot of new ideas. And so I thought, “Great. January started, new year. I am ready to go and jumping into all these new projects.”

But sometimes, when you’re so excited about a vision or all these things in your mind and you sit down at the table to start working on it, all of a sudden, you feel so intimidated.

I think for me it’s a few things all mixed together there’s the self-doubt of starting new projects, and then just trying to get back into anything after a break always takes time. And I know for sure that the first couple of tries, I will be making mistakes just because I’m trying to remember some of the things… trying to warm up.

And as a recovering perfectionist, I often get stuck at this stage. I don’t know why, but the idea of making mistakes often keep me from moving forward.

And a few years back, I learned about this exercise of beginning again, how to begin again. And it has been so helpful for when I feel paralyzed in the process.

This is actually an old Franciscan advice or exercise. Basically, it’s to treat yourself as a beginner. And whatever project or whatever you’re trying to do, just think of yourself doing it as a beginner. And it sounds simple, but it’s such a powerful tool.

When we begin again, we wipe the slate clean. We just toss away any expectation of ourselves and just reconnect and focus on what we need to work on.

And it also helps to get rid of any guilt or shame you may feel about taking a break. The feelings of guilt and shame, they only keep us stuck looking at the past. They don’t really help us move forward. And so when we begin again and start over, we can kind of put those things aside and simply jump back into the process.

This is so helpful when you want to make any long-term changes. Whether it’s about exercising, eating better, or just building any new habits, it takes time for these new routines to form and to adapt. And so whenever you find yourself falling back into old habits or quitting new routines, there’s no need to beat yourself up. Just simply begin again.

This idea of starting and restarting as a beginner is also a great exercise for us folks who wrestle with ADHD tendencies. This practice removes so much of that self-criticism that we always hear in our thoughts that brings the guilt and the shame. And so this exercise is remove those things so we can simply move forward and start to re-engage with the process.

If you have ADHD tendencies, you know what I’m talking about. Even before we start anything, that critical inner voice almost always has already killed any motivation. And so whenever I feel those old voices starting again, I just have to remind myself to simply begin again. Then I can just stop all those criticisms and remove all that self-sabotage.

And so if you have been thinking about starting or restarting any projects or habit in the new year, I hope you will give this a try. Simply begin again and just take that next step.

Treat yourself like a beginner and enjoy the process of learning and discovering.

Treat yourself as a beginner and give yourself the grace to practice without any expectations.

Learning to begin again really helped me get unstuck so many times in my process. I hope it’ll be helpful for you too.

And that’s it for this episode.

For transcript and the podcast archive, please visit sabbathcafe.substack.com.

Thanks for listening, and we’ll see you next time.

My thoughts about Sabbath – Podcast 131 (9:27)

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The idea of Sabbath and rest seem to be a major theme in my life and God often brings my focus back onto rest and the heart of Mary. Maybe this is a good time for me to chat about this topic…

Transcript

You’re listening to Sabbath Cafe Podcast. This is Episode 131, What Sabbaths Means to Me.

Hi, everyone! Thank you for listening to the Sabbath Cafe Podcast. This is Michele. This week, we’re celebrating Thanksgiving here in the States. And I just want to take this time to say a quick thank you for listening to us. You are a great encouragement to me, and I’m so grateful. Thank you.

So recently, I met up with a friend who found my podcast. Since he has a break right now, he jokingly mentioned that he just may take a Sabbath break. And I realized I never did an episode on the Sabbath. Maybe this is a good time to start this conversation. And so here are my thoughts.

And I’ve been thinking about this idea for a long time also because it’s such a counter-cultural idea. Because the Sabbath rest quintessentially is to stop doing.

If you ever are curious about the idea of Sabbath and what it is, it’s just about stop doing work and becoming who you are and stop striving. I think that makes a lot of people very uncomfortable. Because they assume that what it means is that we are not doing anything at all. That being passive or that having a Sabbath time is being passive.

But what I realize is that when I’m doing something or when I’m moving because of people’s expectation, it pushes me to a place where I’m reacting. And more often than not, I’m reacting. And when I’m reacting, I’m not getting God’s guidance. I’m not able to sense the Holy Spirit’s recommendations or insights. And that just brings us back to the story of Mary and Martha.

In the New Testament, there are two sisters. These are Jesus’ contemporaries. So they’re actually real people in biblical times. And there’s one section where Jesus went to Mary and Martha’s house.

I think both Mary and Martha really loved and just think it’s such a great honor that Jesus stopped at their house. But both of them responded very differently.

So when you look in scripture, it says that Mary sat at Jesus’ feet listening to everything he’s saying. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made.

And Martha was, of course, kind of overwhelmed. So she said,

“Jesus? Why are you not telling Mary to help me? Don’t you care that I’m left to do all the work by myself? Tell her to help me.”

And Jesus said,

“Martha, you’re worried and upset about many things, but only one thing is necessary. And Mary has chosen what is better and will not be taken away from her.”

I think I am so much like a Martha. Oftentimes, I find myself in a situation. My first reaction is, what is the situation? What can I do to manage it? I would jump on it and do all this stuff.

But I think what God is saying is to remind me that I’m no longer alone, right? God is not expecting me to do the work by myself anymore. And God is wanting me to learn Mary’s heart, to remember that to sit with Jesus is better.

And that in itself, I think, is the essence of Sabbath.

The other day, I decided to have a day where I’m not worrying about all the situations in my life. I decided that if anything came up, I was going to just give it to God. I’m going to remember to not be anxious about anything but in everything, present my request to God.

Just some of these things where I’m not fixated on things that I currently have no control over and that I just have to wait. And so instead of being fixated about these things, God’s just been reminding me to give thanks and to think about the things that are true and really just to bring my thoughts back to Him.

And that really, I think, has just been such a great breakthrough. Because the rhythm of what I’ve been doing is, like I said, it’s been a really busy season. And so a lot of what I’ve been doing is planning, hosting some families, I had to plan a lot of events.

I just really felt like my whole being, I’ve been just going from one task to another to another. And I felt like I was so busy that I couldn’t stop. That when I stopped doing-when I decided I’m going to put the tasks away- instead of feeling peace, I felt even more anxious.

And I realized that doing these tasks, finishing these tasks, had become a runaway train in that sense. I’m trying to keep myself busy to distract myself from a deeper sense of frustration.

Sure, I can continue to keep this lifestyle going, this rhythm going with all of these excuses. Oh, you know, these are really important. I need to take care of my parents. I need to be praying and I need to help do whatever.

These are all just excuses to keep me going for that next high. And I know that if I’m honest with myself, I know that’s what I’m doing.

And so that’s when God sort of gently tapped me on the shoulder and just kind of go, let’s take a break and get focused on him.

And even as I’m recording this right now, I think that tendency to strive is still there.

And I have to remind myself to just in my heart to kind of go back to that place… of just being with God and just resting in Him and not worrying about how this podcast is going to turn out.

And it’s not, I think maybe it’s not that we don’t do things, but it’s really our attitude.

In our heart and minds, are we turned towards God or are we distracted and overwhelmed by the busyness and the needs that surround us?

Something amazing happens when I turn away from the works of my hands and start to turn my focus back onto Jesus. Usually, there is a reset and a realignment.

My thoughts and perspectives can realign with God’s perspective. Instead of focusing on the situations, my thoughts can now be shifted back onto Jesus.

Instead of replaying the negative outcomes in my mind, I start to remember how God has been faithful through the journey and His promises start to come back to me.

And over the years, I have learned that God really knows best. As my heart starts to let go of the burdens and the worries that I’ve been carrying, the peace of Jesus now starts to flood my soul.

And I can sense God’s kindness and peace in that stillness again. And then I remember what Sabbath is all about. That Sabbath was made for man and not man for the Sabbath.

God is spirit, but we are still made of flesh. And through the practice of Sabbath, it helps me to reconnect with God in my spirit even as I go through my day-to-day routines in this very real material world.

So no matter what kind of season you are in, I’d like to invite you to take a Sabbath break with me. It can be a quiet morning or a few hours in an afternoon. Set your to-do list aside and just spend some time focusing on Jesus. It may just be the recharging break that you are looking for.

And that’s the podcast for this week.

Thank you so much for listening to the Sabbath Cafe podcast.

For transcripts and more, please visit sabbathcafe.substack.com or sabbathcafeblog.com.

Thank you for listening and we will see you next time.

Dopamine Fast Diary – Part 1

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This is inspired by “Dopamine Nation” by Dr. Anna Lembke. Listen to  Sabbath Cafe Podcast #129 for my reflections on the book. 

At the end of her book, “Dopamine Nation”, Dr. Anna recommended a “dopamine fast” to reset our dopamine flooded brains.  Simply put, it’s to identify the habits where once we start, we find it hard to stop, and fast from it for 24 hours.  I felt ambitious, and decided to fast from online-games and TikTok videos for 48 hours.  

Right now, I’m at the 24 hour mark, and it’s been both easy and hard.  

It’s amazing how TikTok style videos still find ways into my feed.  Before I knew it, I’m scrolling through these micro videos again on Facebook, YouTube… To facilitate this process, I pulled out non-digital projects like paper journals and sketch books so I can keep my hands busy and catch up on my creative works.   

Dr. Anna warned about anxiety, irritability, and depression as part of the withdrawal process.  However, at first, I actually felt relieved and enjoyed catching up on some sketching with the extra time that I had.  Surprisingly, I also remembered many things from my to-do list that I had procrastinated on. My “age-related bad memory” turns out to be related to my “dopamine habits.”  

The anxiety and irritability didn’t hit me until the next day.  Actually, it wasn’t so much the anxiety that surfaced, but the pain and frustrations behind the anxiety. Without my “coping habits,” I came face to face with the deep anguish and pain that I’ve been feeling lately from some life changes.  

Here’s a quick disclaimer.  I don’t think what I’m dealing with is extraordinary.  These are simply life situations that we all go through.    My favorite psychologist once mentioned that life is difficult and full of challenges.  And it is in facing and working through these challenges that we can find meaning. That changed my perspective in dealing with trials in life.  Nevertheless, when I am in the midst of it, the emotions can still feel pretty overwhelming.  

I was also surprised because I didn’t think I was repressing my frustration. Reality bites, however.  Without the coping habits, fears and feelings of disappointment surfaced. Their intensity caught me off guard.  Thankfully, I remember how to work through negative feelings.  Feelings need to be acknowledged.  “I feel hurt because…” “I feel disappointed because…”  As I continued to acknowledge my negative emotions, they dissipated, and gave way to peace. Then I remembered insights and scriptures God highlighted about my situation.  These insights cut through the confusion, and reminded me of God’s faithfulness.  For the first time in a long while, I felt hopeful again. 

This is the power of a “dopamine fast.”  I’ll be honest, going through this exercise was not pleasant.  However, it helped me understand why I’d become so easily irritated lately.  When I stopped my coping habits, I stopped “running away,” and started facing my own issues.   

… to be continued in “Dopamine Fast Diary – Part 2“.    

Podcast #121- Finding Peace & Hope in the Storm (5:49)

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Life is a great adventure with sunny days and stormy days. How do we connect with God’s Peace and Hope in every situation? That’s my “homework” right now, and here’s what I learned.

My husband has been recovering from a medical condition, and the process will take over a year at least.  While we’re on this path, there are ups and downs.  Some days are rougher than others.  Recently, he just went through some complications that took 2 weeks for him to recover.  I’m grateful that he’s doing quite well now, almost back to 100%.  But when we’re in the middle of this downturn, I was often exhausted, both physically and spiritually.   

Honestly, when you’re dealing with a serious life issue, any amount of self-reliance goes out the window.  We come face to face with our own limitations, and it hits you just how much of life is really out of our control. Faith and hope can feel very elusive during these times.   

So when we face hardships, how do we find our bearings?  How do we connect spiritually? How do we find encouragement?  These are the questions that came up for me, and I’ll share some things I learned this time around.  

Taking things one day at a time 

It’s very easy to feel discouraged in a season like this. Especially if the situation drags into weeks or months with no end in sight.  One night, I was lying on my bed simply exhausted. The Lord reminded me of Matthew chapter 11 where Jesus invited all who are tired and weary to come to him… That He is gentle and humble. As we give our burdens and cares to Him, we will find rest for our souls.  At that time, I was internalizing a lot of worry and concern, but I wasn’t conscious of it. I was kind of in a “survival mode” sort to speak… And when God reminded me of what Jesus said, I started to tell Him about what was troubling me. And one by one, I gave my burdens to Jesus in prayer.   And in return, I accepted and received His burden that is light.  At the end of my prayer, I felt much lighter, and had one of the best night sleep in a while.     

There is so much wisdom in not carrying stress or anything negative into the next day.  I found that taking things one day at a time was what really helped me not get burned out. In the morning, I rested in God’s mercies that are new every morning.  And at night, I gave my cares and negativity that have accumulating all day to Jesus.  As I received His peace, I slept better, felt more hopeful, and was refreshed next morning. 

Giving thanks for every step forward

And another key lesson I learned was to Give thanks for every step forward… no matter big or small. 

Our recovery process really felt like a roller coaster ride with lots of ups and downs. After a while, I felt kind of disappointed in the process because it took longer than I expected.  That was when God reminded me to give thanks through out my day. 

Thanksgiving has shifted me out of negativity and depression before.  And it was also a gamer changer for me this time. I started to thank God for every small signs of healing and restoration even when I felt down. Right away, I sensed a glimmer of hope and faith rise up in my heart. I started to feel hopeful again.   

Because we’re in the middle of this process, it’s easy to get too focused on the current problem, and forget the many things God has already done.  Thanksgiving not only helped me shift my focus onto the positive things God is doing, it also reminded me of how God took care of us in the past, and that He will continue to help us in this process. 

Looking back, I can see how God was leading me every step of the way.  There was always an encouraging word or promise everywhere I turned.  In my prayers, He was trying to help me change my focus… to shift from a grey and negative outlook to His perspective that is full of hope and joy.  And as I found out, hope and joy are powerful things. I felt more positive and hopeful throughout the day even though the circumstances still looked the same to me. Focusing on one day at a time, giving thanks, and learning to have a positive outlook really helped me not to only survive this season, but to come out feeling more encouraged. 

And that’s my podcast for this week. Working on this episode was really helpful for me to look back and remember what I learned.  I hope it’s also encouraging for all of you out there.  

Podcast #119 – The Power of Our History With God (5:04)

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Newer isn’t always better. Our spiritual history may actually help us get the breakthrough we’re looking for.

Welcome to the Sabbath Café Podcast.  You’re listening to episode #119 – the power of our history with God. 
 
I was sorting through some old notebooks the other day, and a note card fell out.  It was a crafted prayer I wrote about 5 years ago for my family.  I had tucked it away, and totally forgot it.   
 
 It was a small card, and filled up front and back with a prayer I wrote about a broken relationship.  At that time, it felt like the situation was never going to change. These relationships have been broken for years. Honestly, I didn’t know if my prayers were going to make any difference at that point.  Still, I remembered that no request is too small or insignificant to God. And sure enough, after praying this crafted prayer for about a year, a breakthrough happened!  God answered my prayers and reunited a family!  It was nothing short of a miracle.   
 
As I read it, I was amazed that most of my requests have been answered.  Changes didn’t happen overnight, but they did happen.  As I remembered how God made possible what I thought was impossible, my faith rose up.  Suddenly, all of the negativity I felt that week vanished. 
 
In our social media world, we’re always looking for the latest news and trends.  We rarely take the time to reflect on our past.  To be honest, I feel that my generation, me included, don’t really understand the value and purpose of history. I think that’s why I didn’t recognize the value and power of my own history with God. Our history with God is made up of all of the interactions and experiences between us and God. Every prayer He answers adds to that history.  When it comes to building up our faith and spiritual maturity, our history with God can be a powerful tool. 
 
History gives us perspective.  It shows us the big picture and reminds us that real change takes time.  It helps us to be patient and wait for God’s timing.  When we can’t see the hand of God at work, our history reminds us that God is indeed still working.  When we feel discouraged in the middle of the storm, it reminds us that our journey is not finished yet.  Every experience we have with God, whether big or small, adds to our faith. And every interaction we have with God brings our faith to the next step.  
 
When I feel anxious and fearful, these negative emotions can be so overwhelming that I feel paralyzed.  My mind jumps to the worst case scenario and I sink into a pit of negativity.  And that’s exactly what happened to me recently.  I felt the challenges I had were so big… so beyond me that I couldn’t muster up any faith to pray.  But when I found that prayer card, and remembered how God answered the prayers that I thought were impossible, my faith rose up.  I remembered that God is bigger than my challenges.  I remembered that despite my limitations, and my lack of faith, God really can do above and beyond what I can ask, think or imagine.  
 
Are you also facing a difficult situation lately?  Do you feel like you’re dealing with a giant in your life?  Maybe it’s time for you to take a break and remember how God has showed up for you in the past.   Push the pause button on your worries, and think about your own history with God.   If you keep a journal, this is the perfect time to take it out and read a few pages.  Not only will you remember God’s faithfulness to you, you’ll also be encouraged by how far you’ve come and how much you’ve grown in your own journey.  And you may even see that your current challenge is not as big as you thought.  God can and He will help you walk through it, just like He did before.  And you will come out of the storm amazed and transformed. 
 
And that’s our podcast for this week.  I’d like to wish everyone a very happy holiday season.  Thank you so much for listening.  Merry Christmas and we’ll see you in the new year! 

Podcast #112 Finding a theme for your spiritual walk (4:19) (Connecting with God #2)

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Starting a new journey often feels intimidating. I share some prompts and questions in this episode to help you find a personal focus for your spiritual path.

Here’s the podcast transcript:

Welcome to Sabbath Cafe Podcast. You’re listening to Episode 112 – Finding a personal theme for your spiritual life.

So last time we talked about writing a letter to God. And it’s a chance to get reacquainted. I hope you at least gave it a try. I’m hoping writing a letter gave you some momentum so you can continue that dialogue with God. Today, I’ll share about how to find a theme for your spiritual life.

When you’re starting your own spiritual journey, one of the more challenging things is that now it’s more free form. It’s not as structured.  So I get questions from people asking about that because they’re used to going to church and having a sermon or Sunday school program already planned for them.  There’s a theme that’s already picked out.  And suddenly, when you start your own walk with God, and you’re like what do I focus on? What do I do?

So today, let’s look at 2 simple ways to start your own program.

The first question I often ask people is what are some verses that you’ve been thinking about lately? If there are scriptures that come to mind a lot, start writing them down.  And look it up.  Read up the whole chapter… or the whole story, if it’s about a Bible character.  The other day, I was praying, and something reminded me about Queen Esther, so I read parts of the Book of Esther.  It was very insightful and helped answer my questions.   Is your name Joseph?  Maybe you can read up on the story of Joseph.  The key is to keep your heart open and see what truths or insights jump out at you while you’re in this process.  

Another helpful question is… what’s a topic you’ve been curious about or you think about often? Is there a question you’ve been wanting to ask God about?  For a season, I was curious about prayer.  The idea that a normal person like me can influence the divine is simply fascinating.  So I went to a Bible website, and searched for all the scriptures about prayer in the New Testament.  Surprisingly, there weren’t too many in the New Testament. So I just started reading through them.  And I learned a lot about prayer from that.  

So as you can see, there are many ways you can start your own spiritual journey.

The important thing is to find something that you’re interested about so you can start a dialog with God. I’ve found that God is so ready to share His thoughts with us in a personal way… It almost doesn’t matter how or why we come to Him… As long as we do, He will take that opportunity to connect with us. So feel free to jump in wherever you’re at in your journey. 

I hope the ideas I’ve shared in this podcast have been helpful, and I hope you try it.  Have fun, and I’ll see you in the next podcast.

Podcast #111 Reconnecting with God (5:41)

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Many of us feel spiritually isolated lately. In this new podcast series, I’ll be sharing some ideas to help you jumpstart your personal dialog with God. I share my first quick tip in this short episode. Here’s the transcript if you prefer.

Mini-podcast: Any advice for yourself during quarantine? (Covid Reflections #3)

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In this last part of our Covid Reflections minicasts, let’s think about what we’ve learned and see what wisdom or advice you’d like to share with yourself during quarantine.

This finishes up the Covid Reflection series. I will be starting a new series in the next episode. Stay tuned!

Mini-podcast: What did you learn during quarantine? (Covid Reflections #2)

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For part 2 of the Covid Reflections series, I’ll share a surprising lesson I learned from a simple grocery store run. This podcast was originally recorded for Jifcast. Enjoy!

Mini-podcast: How did you change during quarantine? (Covid Reflections #1)

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Through all the ups and downs, many of our communities are slowly transitioning out of quarantine. It’s a great time to reflect on the past few months, and process through this unprecedented event. Here’s my mini-cast (3 min) to help with the process.